On Navigating Transition Times with Grace (+ 12 Ideas to Try)
How are you doing?
I asked a friend this question recently and she said she was in a transition period. And that she was actually comfortable with not being “there” yet, but simply floating and working on where she was “planting her hooks.”
She is following her interests and taking care of herself without the need to have all the answers about who she is becoming and what her life is supposed to look like next.
Isn’t that wonderful?!
I have so much respect and admiration for her level of perspective, faith, and self awareness.
I was in a state of transition myself earlier this year. (The end of a relationship can do that to you.) I spent months floating in the questions and uncertainty and in the slow process of figuring out and becoming.
If I’m being honest with myself, though, I’ve been in transition for a few years. Ever since I sold my previous business and started coaching. Talk about a huge identity and life shift!
And, really, my entire life has been one transition after another.
Yours probably has been, too.
I like to think that I’ve been getting better about the transitions and the messy middles. (At least more philosophical. 😃)
The only constant is change.
We are always growing, evolving, changing. And so are our lives.
Sometimes those periods of change are bigger and more significant than others. But we are always in a state of both being and becoming.
I don’t pretend to have all the answers, but I do think that allowing ourselves grace and patience and curiosity is a lovely way to navigate the transition periods we all go through.
Along those lines, I wanted to share a few ideas and tools for navigating the uncertainty of change that have helped me as well as some of my clients.
So, if you, too, have been in a transition period lately, I hope that you find this post helpful.
Note: This post is written for those of you who know you're in a transition period but don't yet know where you're going. If you do know where you're going, the transition stage is still very valid but the steps to take and ideas to explore may look somewhat different. I'll save that post for another day.
First of all, it’s okay to not know.
It’s okay to not know where you’re going. It’s okay to not have all the answers. Just let it be okay.
It’s okay to not have a vision and a 10-year plan.
You can figure it out as you go.
One step at a time.
Go with the flow.
Allow yourself to go with the flow and see where life takes you.
It's okay to float for a while.
You may find yourself initiating less and responding more. (Just check in with yourself and make sure that what you say yes to feels good to you.)
Follow inspiration and joy.
Follow your interests.
Be curious.
Try new things.
What do you find pleasure in? Do more of that.
I am enough.
If you're in the process of an identity shift, it's easy to get frustrated with yourself. You're no longer who you were and not sure who you are becoming. That's not an easy place to be.
It's enough to just say "I am."
You can follow it with a descriptor or qualifier, if it's helpful.
I am Jean.
I am enough.
I am love.
But "I am" is enough.
12 Tools & Ideas for Transition Times
I also wanted to share some resources and tools that I’ve found helpful for times of uncertainty and transition. In case one or more of them might be helpful for you, too.
1. Make an Exploratory Vision Board
Many people believe that they have to know what they want before making a vision board. But you can also make a vision board to discover what it is that you want. Some of my most powerful vision boards were exploratory processes of discovery and inspiration. Of finding images that spoke to me. This is an “anything goes” vision board. Just play. Be curious. Have fun with it.
2. Journal
Journaling is always a good way to explore ideas, write about what’s going on in your mind and your life, think about the questions, wonder about the future, process feelings, try out plans.
3. Listen to Tosha Silver
Whenever I’m in a place of uncertainty or transition, I re-listen to the audiobook version of Outrageous Openness: Letting the Divine Take the Lead by Tosha Silver. I find her stories, ideas, and perspectives immensely comforting. Maybe you will, too. Or maybe you have your own go-to book or audio that comforts and guides you.
4. Get an Astrology Reading
If you want more self understanding, self acceptance, and even a better understanding of your overall life purpose, an astrology reading can be powerful and profound. You can request a reading from an astrologer you know, find one online, or book a reading with me.
5. Ask the Tarot
I love tarot and oracle cards. My first deck was a gift from a friend over six years ago. And I've since added many decks (my favorites are The Light Seer’s Tarot by Chris-Anne and the Sacred Rebels Oracle by Alana Fairchild). I use my cards to ask for guidance and understanding from the Universe regularly, but especially during times of transition.
6. Practice Gratitude
Gratitude can change your life. I’ve had a gratitude practice for years now and have written a lot about the power of gratitude. Did you know that you can’t feel gratitude and fear at the same time? If you don't have a gratitude practice, I invite you to take my 14-day gratitude challenge. It will help you explore some different gratitude practices and find one or more that work for you.
7. Stay Connected
Get together with friends and talk about what you’re going through.
Get out and meet new people, perhaps at a meetup group, class, or event.
8. Work with a Coach
Get guidance and support for exploring the possibilities and making changes. Find a coach you resonate with who can help you. If you’re interested in coaching with me, reach out. I'd love to have a conversation with you and we'll have a chance to see if we’re a good fit for working together.
9. Try Plant Medicine
This one might not be for everyone, but it's been an important part of my journey in the last couple of years so I'm including it in case it might be helpful for you as well.
Plant medicine, such as psilocybin, can be really helpful for gaining understanding, acceptance, and clarity. It can also be remarkably effective for healing the past, for self development, and for spiritual connection. I’ve been working with plant medicine for over two years now and it has had a significant effect on my life. In fact, I told a trip-sitter early on that I thought one intentional psychedelic experience made a bigger difference than 20 years of talk therapy.
Note: If you’re going to work with plant medicine, make sure you do it safely with proper preparation, set and setting, and integration. And if you don’t know your way around this world, watch Michael Pollan's How to Change Your Mind Netflix series, do your research, find a psychedelic meetup group, attend a workshop, and/or hire a good guide.
10. Play like a Kid
When did we forget how to play? Life doesn’t have to be so serious and adult all the time!
Your actions don’t have to have goal-oriented outcomes.
Do something just for the fun of it.
Blow bubbles. Build a sand castle. Doodle.
Dance. Skip. Twirl.
Watch a comedy.
Get lost in a book.
Eat a bowl of cherries.
Play a board game.
Invite a friend over to hang out.
Strap on the roller blades.
Go for a bike ride.
Enjoy the moment. (That’s what life is. A series of moments to be experienced.)
11. Practice Mindfulness
Any mindfulness practice can be helpful. Something that will help you get out of your own head and just be in the moment. I especially like meditation and sound baths. But breathwork, yoga, or another mindfulness practice might do it for you.
12. Be Active
Move your body. Exercise. Do yoga. Go for a walk. Play pickleball. Whatever. Move your body and be active.
How about you?
Are you in a transition period right now?
What has helped you to navigate times of transition or uncertainty in the past? Do you have any ideas, resources, or stories to share? Feel free to send me a message.